As I Bid Goodbye

By Chatkick 06202015

Before I say goodbye to you, I will have to say, thank you.

Thank you for everything; for teaching me how to forgive and forget. Thank you for making me laugh when I am having my episodes of mood swings. Especially when I overthink and create problems out of nothing and wherein you always tend to calm my nerves.

Thank you for pushing me to my limits, for pushing me to do better and become a better person that I could be. For checking out on me when I need to study, study and study some more. You always reminded me to get some sleep and rest. I know I am stubborn most of the time, and maybe it annoys you at times. Thank you for helping me, when you try to explain things by simplifying it for me to understand it better.

Thank you for reminding me why I need to strive. When I feel like quitting, you always tried to cheer me up and asks me why I am doing this and for whom. And just like that, I will get up and fight again.

Thank you for breaking the walls I built around my heart. For showing me that there are still many things to learn and discover about myself. Thank you for waking me up from my hiatus and by making me feel the world how a human should be, again.

Thank you for coming into my life unexpectedly. That in my general rules, you managed to be the exception.

Thank you for making me realize that love and jealousy comes hand in hand and that 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is really true. And yes, there are still many things to be thankful for.

But as they say, there are times when good things come to an end. Sometimes, you really have to struggle and be hurt in preparation for a better future. Some people say, that God tends to rob you off of something out of your life, to prepare you for something greater than what you want to settle for.

As of now, I am in a phase to refocus. I have to forget the good times as well as the bad that came along our way. Maybe it will take me longer to finally forget you. But I will try my very best. With the help of my friends and family, I know I will get by. I just hope I will not try building walls again.

I still have many questions running inside my mind. Questions with regards to your contradicting words and actions. Questions on why you came into my life. Questions that I try to tame and control. Questions as to why I cannot feel any indifference towards the "wrong" things that you did. Questions as to why I can easily forgive you and why your voice seemed to bring with it colors and light. Ahhhhhhh...Questions, questions, it pains me and it sucks my energy.

I wish you happiness, just like how I wish it for my own. I wish you good health and sound mind. I wish you are indeed happy with her.

I am sorry if I have to do this. But this is the only way that I can think of at the moment for me to keep my sanity. I needed to do this, to protect myself from getting hurt again and again. Even if, this "goodbye" hurts more. I have to do this for me to really focus on my own life, future and goals without you in the equation. Just like how I managed to do prior to knowing you.

I do not know if our paths will ever cross. And I do not know what will happen if ever. I just hope, that if ever we do, we can manage to smile at each other. This craziness that we have between us? It is way out of the ordinary.

But I know too, that until that day when we will finally meet each other, I will not know whether what I felt in the past months from you and for you is genuine and real.

So, as I bid goodbye tonight, I will use the phrase "Au Revoir" rather than "Adieu".

A Letter For My One and Only

June 4, 2015


Dear you,

I have loved you from before, I will love you today and up to the point that we will meet each other in the near future.

I am sorry if I hurt you with my happy-go-lucky life. But I don't regret it at all. Because I know that I will be the best partner you will have, having this way of life.

I am who I am. I am a take it or leave it kind of woman. If you like me, say it and act on it. I will not jump into conclusions because I tend to protect my heart from all the probable hurts by expecting something. Though I get hurt from time to time, please don't worry about me, I know how to handle painful situations.

I will patiently wait for you, and at the same time will enjoy my life without you. I am doing all these in preparation of our life together. I will be strong as always. I will pray for us to meet and be friends with each other. We will be that couple who will protect each other, will guide and support one another. And will catch each other whenever life tries to knock us down. Together we will conquer anything, everything.

We won't be perfect, that's right. But who needs a perfect person anyway? What I want is someone like you. A person whom I can talk to about anything, someone who will listen to me and whom I will listen too. We will be each other's bestfriend. Yes, we will have separate sets of friends, we need them for individual growths but one thing is for sure, we will always seek each others company at the end of the day.

Our arms will be each others' refuge. Our hearts will be each others' home. We will have that random moments of squabbling and misunderstandings, like any normal couple but please promise me to be always open for communication and I will do too. We will always talk to each other even if we are upset with someone, with something or with each other. We will always try to share our fears, frustrations and any negative emotions to each other. I will always try to understand you, and I hope you will do too.

And when all things won't go our way, just remember that I will love you. And from that love alone, we will let our lives and love for each other grow. By that love, we will build a family that will shower love to everybody. Together we will help those who are in need.

But before all these things to happen, I just want to see you soon, soon enough for us to know each other better. Soon enough for us to grow together as a person. It is true that I hope and pray to finally meet you, soon.

I am excited to finally see you, meet you and know you. I hope you are too. We will see each other, that's a promise.


Loving you always,

Me

Contemplation and complications

I was not able to write blogs last year due to some technical glitch called "malware", but as I checked back my blog months ago, the said malware was gone. Then again, I was not able to write anything and was not so eager to do so because I was busy doing things, and was not able to give my time fixing my blog site. *boo me*

Then as I was waiting for my hyper acidity attack to subside, I tried to fix this blog (since I cannot sleep with this pain). I suddenly had the urgency to write again, oh! how I missed writing a blog! I hope I can update this blog more often this year and the coming years.

In the past year, I became a busy bee trying to gather life's nectar. I was busy with life as a daughter, sister, aunt, friend, college instructor, organizer of some sort, photographer and a businesswoman. Life was good as I can say. But time was of the essence with all the hustle and bustle, struggling to fulfill all of the tasks that I was about to do.

Now, as I rewind my life last year and at present, I am thinking on whether I will still continue this circus-like life or should I give up on some posts. But then, deep in my heart and soul I am enjoying and is fulfilled with what I am doing right now -- touching lives, helping people, enjoying time. I am torn between my principles, happiness and striving to be a better (if not the best) person as I can be. I still have many things that I would like to do but my hands were already full of things, or am I just thinking that I am? Do I have to make room for new things or I just have to master these tasks first without giving up on anything at hand?

Life is full of complications, but with proper learning and contemplation with the guidance of God (of course), nothing will go wrong. I am just thankful that I have my family with me who supports my endeavors, old and new friends that keeps me happy, students that gives me inspiration to move further and a GOD that keeps me alive, anchored and fulfilled.

Now I can feel Christmas in the air

Yes! It's been a while since I felt that Christmas is nearing. During the times that I worked in the metro, I was very busy that I can't feel the Christmas air, no decors. It's still different when done in the premises of a "HOME". So, even during the time that I come home here in the province, the feeling still lacks that certain magic.

I am happy that I am here again in our home! Yehey! It's a Merrier Christmas!

Here are some of my photos on our Christmas Preps.

My light painting:

Our Christmas tree:

Having a closer look at our Christmas Ball:

The spray painted twigs used on our Christmas tree:

My cross cut-out filter..:)

My heart cut-out filter..:)

with my eldest nephew..:)

putting the twigs:

My star cut-out filter..:)

Wonderful experience in Ha Noi, Vietnam

Last September 22-27, 2010 I was lucky enough to be a delegate for ASEAN People's forum. But my blog is not really focused on that but more on what have beens in between our meetings.

Vietnam is such a nice place to roam around. They have lots of shops near Huan Kiem Lake (pronounced as Wan Kim Lake) it is the km. 0 of Ha Noi City, anything you need to buy is just around its vicinity. If you're looking for bags like Northface, Chanel, LV, Samsonite, Kipling (just to name a few) they have it in a very low price. But those bags are either replicas or factory defects. Of course I bought a Northface backpack and Kipling aside from having it as souvenirs, I am really wanting to buy one sooner or later. So far they are good, great actually if only for the price.:)

We bought propaganda posters too! I am planning to have it framed in the future (will post some photos of what I have bought sometime soon). There are a lot of things to buy in the market. If only I have lots of money to do so, haha! by the way just to share 1USD = 19, 450 Dong during our stay there. Their food is good too! I love the spring rolls, Ice cream and Bun Cha, try it when you are about to go there!

Every Sunday there is a night market where you can buy until midnight and the lake is illuminated with colorful lights with music. just be wary of motorcycles! Just this for now. Will tell you more about Ha Noi and later our side-trip to Tam Coc before we left Vietnam on my next blog.

If ever someone is going to ask me if I want to go there again, my answer is YES! but for a vacation and not work related..^_^v

In times of trouble: PRAY

I am asking you dear blog readers to please PRAY for my fellow Sorsogeños who are currently suffering from ash fall and volcanic eruptions from Mt. Bulusan. The weather is also unpredictable and there are times that heavy rains are falling along with the ash fall. Most of towns residents near Mt. Bulusan are already worrisome of lahar. It's been months since the eruption of Mt. Bulusan for this year and so far it is more active this days than in the past.

This time where nature is raging, we only have God to hang on to, so please help me pray for their safety and may the Mt. Bulusan lay low now. There are also news that a resident died due to asthmatic attacks that were triggered by the ash fall.

I hope residents near the area have really good gas masks to protect them from ash fall or might as well they'd be lucky enough to have any damp fabric protect their health.

Here's a news from GMAnews.TV:

Phivolcs: Mt. Bulusan spews ash again Sunday morning

11/21/2010 | 09:50 AM 

(Updated 11:27 a.m.) Mount Bulusan, the volcano in Sorsogon, spewed ash as high as two kilometers from the summit Sunday, the Philippine Institute of Volcanology and Seismology (Phivolcs) said.

The ash explosion occurred at 7:22 a.m. and the ash column reached two kilometers above the crater rim and drifted southwest, according Phivolcs' Sunday bulletin.

"The ash ejection was accompanied by a rumbling sound and reflected as an explosion-type earthquake with duration of nine minutes and thirty seconds. Prior to the ash ejection, the Bulusan seismic network detected a total of 12 volcanic earthquakes," it said.

In an interview on dzBB radio, Phivolcs supervising science research specialist July Sabit said that the magma in the volcano is not rising to the surface yet.

Residents located in the northwest and southwest sectors of the volcano were reminded to take precautions against ashfalls.

Radio dzBB quoted Sabit as advising residents near the volcano to use gas masks to protect themselves from the ash.

Phivolcs added that the residents near valleys and river or stream channels should be watchful against sediment-laden stream flows and lahars because ash and other loose volcanic materials may be re-mobilized during heavy and prolonged rainfall.

For his part, Phivolcs volcanologist Ed Laguerta said rains in recent days may trigger lahar flows in Irosin town.

"It may be advisable for residents to leave their homes after about 30 minutes of heavy rains," he said. http://www.gmanews.tv/story/205308/phivolcs-to-sorsogon-residents-avoid-danger-zone-around-bulusan


“It may be advisable for residents to leave their homes after about 30 minutes of heavy rains," Laguerta said. — JE/VS, GMANews.TV

Batanes: My dream destination!

Batanes: An Island on the Northernmost part of the Philippines, a place which is hit by typhoons most of the year and was given much attention in recent years for it's beauty beyond compare! and the only place in the Philippines that experiences four seasons just no snowflakes and white Christmas, hehe!

I have couple of friends who are also having Batanes in their long list of travel destinations and we always dream that one day soon we'll be given a chance to visit and walk around it's green green grass, take good photos and all..:) but, budget is always the main concern (as always, aside from time). It is so expensive! imagine spending a couple of thousands just for the fare! I once browsed through the internet to see how much it would cost me to book a two-way flight from Manila to Batanes, and it's a whooping 10 thou++ (not so sure if it's a two-way ticket already), maybe because it's peak season. So, I set aside that dream but at the back of my mind, I am telling myself to save money for my Batanes trip.

Why of all places, I want to go to Batanes? I don't know, maybe for the fact that I see parts of it in travel programs and I fell in love with the place. I want to feel the greens, to breathe the air that the Ivatans are enjoying, to run, to swim and to take photographs of that scenic place!

Batanes is such a good destination for lovers, soul searchers, nature lovers, photo enthusiast etc., its serenity seems to give peace to the mind of the burdened. I want to explore Batanes not only once but over and over again! If only it's near our hometown I'd live there just like how I did in Baguio.:)

I want to take my own photos of these that I saw on the internet. To meet and greet Ivatans, to experience buying at the honesty store -- the sooner, the better! and of course have something to blog about!(and the long list of what to do's follows)

The lighthouse and the coastlines:

This stone Chapel:

Their stone houses that withstand super typhoons!

I hope that someday I have someone with me that I can go to Batanes and will have the chance to say "I Chad Lao Koy Mo" to under the bright blue sky while walking at the long coastline of Batanes.

Hmmmnnnn, could it be that I can visit Batanes for the first time with the help of SEAIR? Well, if anyone here doesn't know yet, Seair is having a blog contest again for Batanes! Yes, you read it right. They're giving a tour to Batanes for this winter season!!

To know more about them and their contests you can visit their Facebook fan page at http://www.facebook.com/flyseair or if you want to check their flights just visit http://flyseair.com

If given the chance, it'll be my first fly with SEAIR! (because I happened to have cancelled my flight to Boracay last March 2010 due to some circumstances)

P.S. If you happen to have an FB account and liked this post, please vote for my entry. Thank you and God Bless! (but you have to like Seair's fanpage first before liking my entry)

Hello!Hello! Can you help me get/earn many likes for my blog entry? You just have to like www.facebook.com/flyseair and then like my/this entry http://www.facebook.com/flyseair/posts/10150094177191171 Thanks a lot!.:)‌

Photo courtesy:

http://blog.folrana.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/batanes.jpg

http://lakwatsero.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Batanes200912027.jpg

http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/8986/batanes3ij7.jpg

Wow!Quicker8.com is having another contest!^_^

I don't blog hop that often for these past months, but one thing is for sure, if there's a blog that's in my number 1 list for blog hops, it's www.quicker8.com! So, I was amazed that she is throwing a blog contest again from October 12, 2010 to December 18, 2010. Anyway, I haven't got the chance to join her last blog contest 'coz I haven't got the chance to do so. I hope I'll win, especially for that wrist watch because I am in dire need of one, hmmmnnn, good birthday gift too!hahaha!wish-a-wish-a-wish-wish-wish!..;)

Faye a.k.a Quicker8 is sooo generous to give away these prizes: (Just in time for Christmas Season eh?)

1st prize - Fossil Ladies Watch

2nd prize - Fossil Ladies Watch

3rd prize -Kate Spade kikay kit (orange)

HERE's HOW:

1. Subscribe to her feed via email located right side bar (REQUIRED ) - 1 Entry
2. Blog about the contest along with the Prizes {You MUST include the Prizes and My link}- 5 Entries
- If you have multiple blogs, much better. Each blog post along with the Prizes -5 Entries.
3. Leave a comment her post telling me what you did and give me the link of the blog post. 1 Entry.
4. Comment to any of her post. From Oct 12,2010 to Dec 18,2010 and you’ll have 1 entry each comment.
-Make it sure it's at least three word ! LOL And NO SPAMMING, PLEASE!

The Contest ends on December 18, so if you wish to participate you must enter before that date. Winners will be announced on December 28,2010! The winners will be picked through Random.org!

So what are you waiting for?? Visit her blog, go to her entry and join now! (Click Here)

God bless guys!..^_^

When to quit your JOB?

When to quit your JOB?

by CHATKICK 10/27/2010

Many asked and are still asking me WHY I quit my job; during the time when many people earnestly seek an at least minimum wage job for a living. Some ask this for guidance and some for their mere curiosity. Let me share with you my reflections. (might help you decide on which path to take or at least will give you answers if you belong to the group of people who are still wondering what the hell am I doing with my life, hehehe!*feelingera ba? nakakapagod lang kasing paulit-ulit ikwento ang mga bagay-bagay kaya madalas hindi ako sumasagot sa mga tanong, now I decided to share my thoughts again after a long, long time of solace*)

December 2009, I decided to quit my job which I scheduled by March 2010. I loved my work. I had a good working environment. But one thing was slowly drifting. ME. I felt that I am slowly withering. I became a workaholic, working almost 36 hours when we were meeting our deadlines and sometimes camping in our office just to finish the tasks 'coz if not, we'll surely be drowned with more tasks. During those times I haven't got the time to connect with my family and other friends who were outside the realm of work that I am in. Although once in a while we divert ourselves to breathe and so we say: TO HAVE A LIFE.

I loved my work, I had good time working there, I was having an above minimum-wage compensation but then I QUIT.

WHY? I'll tell you why.

I am a person with simple dreams. I recognize the use of money in this world but does not always rely on having many of it. I know how to live in leisure, but I know too how to live by the absence of it, in other words I can live with the extremities of life. I am ready to face anything but I need to be sure though that I AM INTACT. Meaning, I am composed of a combination of HOPE, LOVE, TRUST, COMPASSION and an UNSHACKLED SOUL. A person with VISION and INTEGRITY.

By the rate that I was going during those years that I am working, I foresaw myself to be stripped-off of the core values that I am living by. Hence, making me another person or a less person that I was. Maybe I was just afraid of the unknown. Or maybe, I just saved myself from collapse of identity. Anyhow, I just did what I thought was right at that very moment. That was the time that I needed to recharge myself -- my soul. Moreover, I thought that I cannot give more of myself to other people by having less for myself. Only thing that saved me was, I was not working in a corporate world by the time that I burned myself with work. It could have been more difficult for me to accept personally.

If you feel you are also in this kind of situation or just wanting to quit your respective jobs, the following points are the things that should be considered. (well, at least for me during the time that I decided to do so)

1. Be firm about your decision. After thinking about it over a hundred times or more. With praying and asking of guidance from Above.

2. Have a back-up plan. Don't you just quit abruptly, without a good back-up plan, you'll face many obstacles that you haven't thought about while you are just planning to quit.

3. Be sure to know your potential. As a person, you should know your limits and potentials.

4. Seek the guidance and support of your family. They are your support system in times of difficulty as well as they know how to handle you in case you are having personal problems.

5. Have a vision. Know what you want to do and become in the coming years.

6. Reach for your dreams. Cliche as it may seem, but it can help you have a better life, if not happy.

7. Ask yourself if you are happy with your current condition/life. Happiness have a great bearing in our lives and the ultimate state of this is BLISS, in one way or another, we all seek happiness.

8. Make sure you are financially stable. You have at least savings to start your life anew or you have a concrete plan on how to generate your future finances.

9. Don't just quit because you want to. But because you have to.

10. Do it with all of your being. To quit a job, you have to be 100% sure. Don't do it half-heartedly, for you may suffer from regrets.

These are just ten things to consider, it can go more than that. Just on making decisions, be sure to make it with a sound, balanced heart and mind. And when you still have difficulty deciding, just let your heart decide. Know your instinct, your heart knows what to do.

Stargazing In Bulan et al.

After so much mental processing about my life, my heart and my soul I boiled into one decision. To come HOME and enjoy LIFE as it is with my family and friends.

I had fulfilled my urges to work as an employee. I enjoyed it, I was happy but I was so stretched that I never had time for myself, family and friends. I haven't had the time to look up at the sky, look around the environment, appreciate them and thank God enough for the blessings.

I was somehow faced by a crossroad. I suddenly felt drained that I needed to renew and regain myself/my soul. Somewhere along the way I felt that I was withering. At this young age I was happy but a hole in my heart slowly gets bigger and just like a black hole it continues to absorb my soul. Luckily, I was guided by my Creator. I found the answers to my questions before I reached the event horizon (point of no return surface of a black hole).

Slowly, I felt that I am again my old self, only more mature but still had to loosen a bit more. I can once again see vibrant colors, hear lovely music and melody, gaze at the sky with so many stars in it. My old hobby revived. Stargazing.

For nights I had always experienced to look up at the sky at night, feel the heat of the sun at day and cold wind blows at this 'El Niño' phenomenon. Walk around with my camera, talk with family and friends, read good books, dream and thank God for all that He provided us, for protection, for courage, for wisdom and for love.

I am sharing you this, for you to know that you are not alone, WE are not alone. We have a God who will always be with us. We just have to listen closely, ask eagerly, receive whole-heartedly and thank Him Fully. Have a blessed life! God is with us. :)